I'm not sure what it says about me personally but I am constantly & pleasantly surprised at how God has worked in our lives. In previous weeks the hubby and I have diligently been praying for guidance. We were both exhausted (having numerous family obligations) & finding absolutely no time throughout the week to rejuvenate ourselves. We love everything we do however there is only so many hours in the week, and something was going to have to give.
We fully expected some kind of answer while we took 10 days away from it all. Clearing our minds of the chaos that has become our lives in hopes of making room to be able to hear Him properly. Every couple of days I'd turn to dear hubby & ask, "so have you had any epiphanies yet?" The answer was always the same, "nope, have you?"
We came home with the same questions we left with. What does He want us to do? Where can we best use our gifts? Out of the things we have a passion for what can we possibly let go?
In our minds, we were leaning towards having to let go of our ambitions to lead the teen program at church. (something that had given us some knots in our stomachs) It had recently changed nights which was additionally challenging for us.
We felt even more urgency for answers when we were asked to speak to the congregation about how God was leading us to work with the teens...Yikes! How in the world are we going to answer THAT one?! What a dilemna!
Again the answer came when I least expected it. While sharing my frustrations with the Ladies Life Group (a small group of ladies that meet weekly to not only share God's word but also their lives) there were observations shared with me that made things clearer & also eased my mind. And the clincher was something that I myself said in relation to someone else. We need to love people where THEY are at.....then it occured to me, why can't that same philosophy be afforded to us? Why can't we love people where WE are at? Do we have to do God's work by adding another ministry or can we just embrace all those people into the ministries we're already involved in?
So with some trepidation we needed to tell our pastor. We knew in our hearts that he would understand but there was still that feeling that we were going to be letting him down. The time had come though and we couldn't put it off any longer. Then just as I opened my mouth to speak, he says he has a favor to ask. Something unexpected had come up & he needed us to take over the next night's teen gathering! I think I chuckled out loud as I looked to my husband and nodded that it was ok with me. We did then explain that unfortunately we weren't going to be able to do this on a regular basis. We both felt a weight lifted though. And we even discussed that we'd still be able to be used for the good of the teens it just wasn't going to be within the format of teaching the group.
The following night, things went off without a hitch. And we enjoyed ourselves in the process (probably partially because that weight had been lifted) Afterwards one of the young people approached me very perplexed about some things in their life. I asked if it would help to talk things out privately which they agreed. When we met the next day after a few hours of conversation they asked if I'd be willing to study with them on a weekly basis to help them stay focused.
The thing is although I'd have wanted to help I don't know for certain if I'd have so easily offered my time for a private study, if we were still doing the 'group' thing regularly. Another interesting thing...as I said yes to them there were no knots in my stomach or feelings of dread that I was once again biting off more than I could chew. In fact it made me feel happy inside.
What are the chances? Coincidence? Maybe...do I really think so? Not a chance!